"it's all a lot of oysters, but no pearls"

In the words of Adam Durtiz:

A Long December by Counting Crows

"A long December and there is reasons to believe
Maybe this year will be better than the last
I can't remember the last thing that you said as you were leaving
Now the days go by so fast

And it's one more day up in the canyon
And it's one more night in Hollywood
If you think that I could be forgiven
I wish you would

The smell of hospitals in winter
And the feeling that it's all a lot of oysters but no pearls
All at once you look across a crowded room
To see the way that light attaches to a girl

And it's one more day up in canyon
And it's one more night in Hollywood
If you think to come to California
i wish you would

I drove up to Hillside Manor sometime after two am
Talked a little while about the year
I guess the winter makes you laugh a littler slower
Makes you talk a little lower
About the things you could not show her

And it's been a long December
And there's reason to believe maybe this year will be better than the last
I can't remember the last time I tried to tell myself to hold on
To these moments as they pass

And it's one more day up in the canyon
And it's one more night in Hollywood
It's been so long since I've seen the ocean
I guess I should."

I don't know why i have been so critical to making new years resolutions. I suppose i'm too stubborn- it's not that I think myself too perfect for change- hell, i know i could make a million goals to change for the better, and i'd still be the fumbling, bumbling person i am. I don't really trust myself to the goals either- experience has taught me that my resolve buckles extremely easily. But that's not really any excuse not to try, and i've decided on this eve, that I will attempt, at least, to be a better person this year. And i've got to stop thinking that it's a hopeless pursuit, because in thinking so, i know i will make it so. So stop it Kate. Please. I just want to try, ok?

Whenever my sister sees my typing away on you, my dear bloggie, she always scoffs and says
"kate. No one actually CARES." (which i think is a fairly hypocritical comment, seeing as she possesses an even more pointless myspace, which i see only as an outlet to pose yourself in the most sexy manner possible and try to see if others comment on how alluring you are.)
The thing is, i know there are only hmm, i dunno, a few of you out there, who read this because it is an acceptable time-filler. But, see, i don't actually KNOW that. I can't tell for certain. So i prefer to live in hope, thankyou very much. Hope and ignorance. But even if these words go no where- just text floating in the internets seemingly eternal expanse of information...well. It feels right, writing. It feels adventurous (see how much my life has sunk into the doldrums? wait. self pity kate. stop it.)

• stop up the self piteous emotions. It doesn't achieve anything, and makes me repulsive to be around
• try to be more positive. You know, glass half full and all that crap. Which reminds me...
• swear less. my mother has a rather bad habit of swearing, and i seem to have picked it up somewhere along the way. Verbally, (in public anyway) i don't swear too much. But in my head...well, that's a different matter. Like Jani said, i am a silent swearer.
• think about others. Stop focussing on myself all the time.
• re-aline morals
• write more. Preferably a story. I've been putting it off forever- whenever i make an attempt, i write one sentence, look at it for several minutes then growl, scrunch the page up into a ball and hurl it in the bin, then stalk off.
• do more art. Experiment.
• Try to be more sociable. This is a big one for me, because sometimes even the idea of company scares me. I have had so many past occasions (not with you guys...before that...in Brisbane and stuff) where i have just wanted to stick my head in the ground and never reappear because i've been such fool ("samwise, you fool") that the situation has been too awkward to bear.
• don't judge others so harshly. View everyone with an open mind. Cause, well, i can't speak.
• be nicer to my family. help with chores n stuff. get off my ars every once in a while.
• study hard. predictable, i know.

there is another one...the one i want to achieve most of all...and have wanted to achieve in a long time...but, i won't say it.

I bought a diary today, and i hope that's going to help.

well, happy new year, everybody! 2008 eh? Goes by like lightening, don't it? Blink, and we'll be 70, sitting round knitting doilies and sipping cups of elderberry tea (pinkies out, remember). It reminds me of a song by five for fighting. God, they're amazing.

"15 there's still time for you

Time to buy and time to choose

Hey 15, there's never a wish better than this

When you only got 100 years to live."

www.goodquotes.com

I found this really good website yesterday...

www.goodquotes.com

very, very funny. Especially the mistranslations section. Let me show you some of my faves.

GGAAAARRRR!!! what the hell??? it isn't working. What do you mean " this page cannot be displayed? Cannot find server?" damn. well. shall try again later.

10 mins later.

yay! ok, here we go.

1. Billboard on the side of the road: Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs.
2. In a cleaner’s window: Anyone leaving their garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of.
3. In a toilet: Toilet out of order. Please use floor below
4. In an office: Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday kindly bring it back or further steps will be taken.
5. In the vestry of a New England church: Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is extinguished.
6. On a Maine shop: Our motto is to give our customers the lowest possible prices and workmanship.
7. Athens, Greece hotel: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.
8. Copenhagen airline ticket office: WE take your bags and send them in all directions.
9. Zurich hotel: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.
10. Roman doctor's office: Specialist in women and other diseases.

HAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAA!!!

gotta love em.

scrabble player...sounds good

i should probably point out the three new sections to my bloggie; Recommended Albums, Filmus Recommendus and Recommended Sites [which currently has one address. how sad]

I am currently trying to find opportunities for community service. There is NOTHING.
*kate raises her hackles*
...
do humans have hackles? Hm.

hmm. actually, i went to seek.com volunteer, and found quite a bit. guess what, there were some people who were looking for a SCRABBLE PLAYER! i made an expression of interest.

well, i hope i'm able to get into some. Cause i really want to get it over and done with.

removed...

QUOTES OF THE DAY:

"Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them."

"I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours."

"We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture." --Robin Williams.

31 things to do in a train

If one induces half a snigger, then i have by far exceeded my expectations.

THINGS TO DO IN A TRAIN.
[complied by an embarassingly inadequate kate]

1. Don't wash for a week, then take off your shoes, announcing 'ah! that's better!"
2. Bring a whoopee cushion. Be inventive
3. Limp feebly onto a full train (sound effects like hideous moans are also recommended). When someone stands up to offer their seat, pounce on it and shrik "HA HA!! SUCKERRS!"
4. When the train starts, chant 'chugga chugga, chugga chugga, chugga'. Get increasingly excited as the train picks up speed until you are hopping round the carriage shrieking excitedly 'CHUGGA CHUGGA, CHUGGA CHUGGA, CHUGGA CHUGGGGAAA!!!' Faint.
5. Pull out a pen from your briefcase. Use it to draw faces on your fingers. Play with them. Invite others to join.
6. Beam around at the passengers, before announcing loudly "i'm not wearing any underpants"
7. Wink suggestively every few seconds.
8. If you a man, wear a bra with a tightly fitting top underneath. Cross your arms and look embarrassed. If anyone stares, snap "i have a problem, ok"
9. Do a Darth Vador impression
10. Openly flick through porn magazines. Exclaim every now and again comments like "oh mama!" and "would you look at the size of THOSE!"
11. Sit down next to an empty seat. If someone moves to take it, yell "what are you doing? Charlies sitting there!" Cast them dark looks for the rest of the ride.
12. Listen to your i-pod. Feel free to sing along.
13. Wear the disguise glasses (the ones with the large nose and moustache and thick-rimmed glasses). Slump in your seat so you can't be seen in the window.
14. Sniff loudly, then wrinkle your nose. Bring out a bottle of perfume and spary it petulantly throughout the carriage.
15. If someone brushes up against you, jump and holler "STOP MOLESTING ME!!"
16. allow silence to prevail for a while, then announce "i'd like to talk about Jesus."
17. Settle down comfortably on your seat, rubbing your hands on your thighs excitedly. Look about in wonder while remarking to the person next to you "this is nice. Isn't this nice?"
18. Stand up and announce you are a sex addict. Wiggle your eyebrows suggestively.
19. Try to touch your nose with your tongue.
20. Introduce yourself personally to everyone in the carriage.
21. Shimmy down the aisles
22. Casually trip passengers as they stand up to go.
23. Stare at the person opposite for a while, then begin to laugh. Don't stop.
24. Do golem impersonations.
25. Explain with vigour why you believe aliens control Americas legal system.
26. Clutch onto the handle and whimper for the entire journey.
27. Fix a beady eye upon a man, then say accusingly "you're gay. I can sense it."
28. Pretend to fall asleep when standing.
29. Look horrified when you look at the person sitting in front of you. Take out your glasses, and colour them in black permanent marker. Put them on, looking relieved and say "that's better!"
30. Grunt
31. Look at someone sympathetically, smile sadly, and say "it's ok, dearie. We all know it's not your fault."

QUOTES OF THE DAY:

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally. -- W.C. Fields

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. -- Noel Coward

The less people know about how sausages and laws are made, the better they'll sleep at night. -- Otto von Bismarck

"MAKE EM LAUGH, MAKE EM LAUGH, MAKE EM LAAAAUUUGH!!!" [song in Singin' in the Rain!]

in out. in out. it's easy kate. in. and out.

breathe, kate. just breathe. asphixiation won't help anyone.

i just phoned up coles to apply for a job there at Floreat.
why did i have to stutter so?

h-h-hello. *looks down at sheet of paper in front of her* um, my name is Kate, i-i-i was just w-wondering if there is any er, er casual job opportun-opportunities available??? *a ragged breath rips through the phone*
"No, honey, i'm afraid not. Are you in university? (i was slightly flattered)
No. I'm in highschool. I'm 15.
[ i could palpably feel the air freeze. '15??? i could hear her thinking. Is she out of her friggin mind??? good luck to anyone who gets sucked into employing THAT little squirt.]
"um, no positions available. Maybe ring back in 6 weeks," the ladies voice says.
[6 weeks??? i'll be back in school by THEN. jeez"

I rang Woolworths next and they were much friendlier. i got put on hold, and found myelf TAPPING MY FOOT TO THE MUSIC before a rough voiced man told me that i should apply on the internet [basically hinting for me to stop wasting his time].

why am i doing this again??
just think of the moolah kate. the MOOlah.

hmm. actually the amount i will be earning per day will probably be wasted on lunch. sigh.

but I SHALL PERSIST!!! those bastards won't get rid of me THAT easily.

oh lordy. i'm screwed.

QUOTE OF THE DAY: (impersonation guy from u-tube doing kermity frog)

"it's not easy being green."

ERROR 167

bummer.
green day: "where is my motivation???"

inspiration has dried up...brain...failing....must engage in activity...which doesn't include staring at something for a prolonged period of time....neurons have slowed to speed of kate running...
NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

BRAIN DISFUNCTION
...
BRAIN DISFUNCTION
...
ERROR 167
ERROR 167

booglidooglidooooommmbumbumbumweenienooooooooidum.

Black Books and Black Night

I watched one of the funniest shows on television that i have HONESTLY ever seen.

Twas called "black books"; an english comedy which included such dazzling antics such as a man who choked on the 'little book of calm' and thus became a semblance of a refulgent patron saint; a man who made a coat out of his tax accounts; and two men who arrived at the door asking "we'd like to talk about Jesus" and the man replied "Sure! Come in!

AHAHAHAHAHA!!! I HAVEN'T LAUGHED SO MUCH IN A LONG TIME!!!!

absolute hoooooot, i assure you!

It was rather strange, as it happens, for that night's hilarity was followed in sleep by the most horrific nightmare. I actually woke up with the start of a scream in my throat. I can't remember it very clearly, but I was running from something in the woods; and was attempting to run and hide in tree trunks.

I got back to the motel where my family and I were temporarily staying, and I tried to convince them to GO, to leave everything behind and just RUN, because the thing behind them wasn't going to wait for them to pack their bags. Oh, gosh, i was so inexplicably scared. Panic in dreams is so unnerving. It just overwhelms you, doesn't it? Like a noose around you neck, or something.

The weirdest thing is, i don't think i actually ever saw what exactly i was running from.

QUOTES OF THE DAY:

"Time is the best teacher, but unfortunately, it kills all of its students." - Robin Williams

"Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings."- ?

"Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped."- ?

To the New Year...and beyond!

"Hey Everybody!"
"Hey Doctor Nick!"
I sincerely hope that your christmas was filled with and baubles and tinsel and presents and Uncle Sid swigging a pint of egg nogg while lecherously rubbing his leg up against Aunt Marie.
You know, i used to get so excited about Christmas. I would barely be able to sleep on the eve, imaging all the morrow would bring. As soon as I opened my eyes from the nights slumber, I would leap out of bed, bound about the house, a smile stretched impossibly across my face, a bundle of unrestrainable energy. But now...
Kate wakes up. She blinks sleepily. oh, she thinks. It's christmas. That's nice.
But, now, i just don't really care. I'm like some form of apathetic Scrooge.
I think my loss of enthusiasm can be attributed to my lowering of expectations. I mean, it's better to be pleasantly surprised than disappointed, isn't it? It's better to feel nothing than be hurt. But it does have its drawbacks, i admit.
I did ZILCH yesterday. No. I'm serious. Just lazed around, read, tried to memorise all the countries in South America
[wait, wait...argentia, bolivia, brazil, chile, columbia, equador, guyana, peru, paraguy, surninam, urugay...and, um, um...venezuala. yay!]
and basically executing an impressive simulation of a slug.

i did watch this AWESOME film, however. Twas a Japanese animation on SBS called "howl's moving castle.' The name sounds vaguely familiar, and I have a feeling you guys may know of it...? Ah, well. It was a poignant and revelling journey of mystique and surrealism which i did not want to end.

In Tasmania, there was so much roadkill, it was unbelievable. Drive 2m...'oh look! isn't that pleasant! Another animal's guts splayed across the gravel!' It goes without saying that mum tried not to drive over the furry morass, but occasionally it could not be avoided, and i would wince with each 'bumpity-bump.'
At first, at the sight of the sprawled remains, i would experience the sensation to heave up whatever was in my stomach by the side of the road...but after a few days, i became curiously desensitised. I even found myself subconsciously making a game out of it- you know; 'guess what the mangled mess on the road used to be.'

Did you know there is a liquor store over there called 9/11 bottle shop?? I mean, it's not as though it was named after the disaster, (opens from 9am-11pm)...but, how awkward. I would have definitely changed the name, at least. It could be interpreted as offensive.

well. I am hot. I am wearing my dressing gown, and it is about 40 degrees so i feel the need to change. Fast. Or i shall melt like the wicked witch of the west.
"i'm melting. MELTING!!!" *melts into a gooey puddle of noxious-smelling ooze*

Oh my god, what is wrong with me?? i have forgotten 'quotes of the day' for almost 4 entries *kate slaps herself with a rubber thong.* well, here it is:

QUOTES OF THE DAY: (quotes from quotes from some guys blog)

"some people are like slinkies: pretty much useless, but they still make you smile when you shove them down the stairs."

"raisins used to be fat and juicy and now they're twisted. they had their lives stolen. they taste sweet, but really they're just humiliated grapes. i can't say I am a big supporter of the raisin council."

"Sometimes the world seems like a big hole. You spend all your life shouting down it and all you can hear is some idiot shouting nonsense down a hole." <<>

why is everyone christian??
ok. that came out of the blue... no, i'm not being offensive, *god is cool* if that's what sails ya boat. It's just i'm currently perusing randoms bloggies at the moment, and almost EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM throws in comments spasmodically to the tune of
"Jesus, my saviour! Praise his holy knickerbockers! I will follow him to eternity and beyond! etc. etc."
It's just...unexpected. Yes. Unexpected is the word.

Oh. AH HA. yeah. almost forgot. Happy Christmas everbody. SNIGGER SNIGGER. Kate got to open her presents a day before you. See, because my mother has a polish background, there is a tradition which delineates that we get our stickly little hands on gifts on Xmas Eve. Phili was exceptionally taken aback when i told her via MSN. I suppose it IS weird...but that's how it has happened all my life...so my response is currently: meh.

Anyhoo, I am exceedingly pleased with what i received. :D :D :D
Because...I AM NOW THE PROUD POSSESSOR OF "DOOKIE" (GREEN DAY) AND "FILMS ABOUT GHOSTS (COUNTING CROWS)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

yayyyyyyyyyyyyy!!! I feel inclined to admitting i actually kissed both CD's upon receiving them. SO happy. If i believed in God, i would be praising him. As it happens, i don't, so i am instead thanking Mr. Bumble, who lives in my pinkie.
Thankyou Mr. Bumble. I owe you a lot.

I am rather relieved that i did not get any presents that did not...gel with me, not to put too fine a point on it. Not because i would feel sorry for me, but because i would feel sorry for the person who gave it to me. Because, after all, they bought it with the intention that the receiver would absolutely love it...
So. No awkward moments. *eg*
Kate tears away the packaging, exposing a pair of nose hair curlers
*pause*
A frozen smile, glazed eyes.
"OOHHHH. Thankyou! I was really in need of...nose hair curlers. Very...nice."
[note: whenever anyone says they think you're present is 'nice' it actually translates into 'i hate it, but don't want to hurt your feelings.']

omg!! Amy also got me this AWESOME Johnny Depp poster of GARGANTUAN proportions. She made me a montage poster as well, which was sweet: it has Green Day, Counting Crows, and Simpsons pics on it. Both are currently up on my wall.

man. It's HOT. 38, 39??? Tomorrow is going to hit 40.
Oh god, what am i doing??? am i really talking about the WEATHER? My inspiration must have dried up (it takes liquid form, so i am blaming it on the unbearable heat).
Just stop, Kate. Stop before your reader falls asleep at the keyboard, and because she was holding a glass of water, the H2O reacts with the electricity and causes and jolt of energy to shoot through them, making them have a heart attack, making them go to hospitable, but then the lunatic nurse overdoses them with morphine, thus causing the said person to go high, then die.

WAIT!! one more story. I suddenly remembered- one day while listening to the radio in the car, a story caught my attention. I goes like this. It is a true story.

A man was driving in his car, and desperately needed to go to the bathroom. It was stormy outside with thunder rumbling overhead. He was on a highway, but nonetheless, pulled over to the side, and stepped out of the car. He pulled down his fly, and let loose a stream of relief. and then....CRASHAHSAHHSAHSHH!!!!!! A bolt of lightening hit him!!! Usually it would have been grounded, but....he was wearing GUMBOOTS! So instead of the electricity leaving him through his feet, it left him THROUGH HIS WATERY EFFLUENCE! poor guy. In my understanding, little Rod suffered intense damage.

Merry Christmas, once again!

a merry christmas to all!!

to all a merry christmas!!!!

ho ho ho...ho. ho hum.

:D

hope you don't get nappy rash powder. Unless you need it, of course.

guess what? i am a genius!!! ok, i heard mum saying the yesterday

"oh, i wish i had bought a cheese board for myself AND uncle Peter. We really need one."

and....

brace yourself

i actually bought one for her THE DAY BEFORE.

boo ya!

When i heard her say it, i was almost writhing in my seat from my predetermined success! Score!

Revenge is Sweet

kate is clever.
clever kate.
kate copied convo.

⇢ sammie tokito says:
aww how cute he must look masturbating
⇢ sammie tokito says:
awwwwwwwww sweeettttt
Kate says:
WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WWAAAT????
⇢ sammie tokito says:
hmm?
⇢ sammie tokito says:
isn't it cute? no?
Kate says:
VERY.
⇢ sammie tokito says:
aww and the facial expressions and moans
⇢ sammie tokito says:
Complete charm
Kate says:
omg.
Kate says:
you pervert!!!
⇢ sammie tokito says:
no? not quite feeling it?
Kate says:
hahahhaha
Kate says:
maybe a twinge
⇢ sammie tokito says:
hah
⇢ sammie tokito says:
aww
⇢ sammie tokito says:
cuteeeeyyyyyawwwbooobooo!!
Kate says:
this is the stuff u dream about. i can tell.
⇢ sammie tokito says:
it is
⇢ sammie tokito says:
at a loss for words?
Kate says:
and just before you go to sleep you imagine him pulsating
⇢ sammie tokito says:
oh how masculine
⇢ sammie tokito says:
aoohhhh the strength!
Kate says:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHH
⇢ sammie tokito says:
the boy can date rape me anyday!
Kate says:
OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
Kate says:
You are unbelievable!!
⇢ sammie tokito says:
heeehaww

blah

got back two days ago at 12am...but seeing as I was still on Tazi time, it seemed to me like 2am.

I shall not go right now into detail in what happened; ah yes! the suspense! Can ya feel it?
Nah, it ain't that. I just don't want to sink into that loathsome pithole just yet.
Instead, i shall relate to you a little episode of what happened today.

I went into the city to get my tax file number. 'What?' you wonder. 'But that was already done through the school wasn't it?'
Yes, Kate answers. Yes it was. But lazy ol me forgot all about it...so...
We got Amy's number too. Because she can't locate her student ID, we needed furthur information for her to complete the process.
Mother and me thus journeyed to the nearest ANZ branch to get some kind of form. We entered, and i plonked myself down on a chair and watched in aghast a program which explored the art of snail racing.
However, mother found the lady at the desk...how you say? Not very accomodating. A euphamism for a complete and utter bitch. Mother kept trying to tell her 'i just need this one form with my daughters name on it' and she kept returning, [paraphrase] 'well, you can't have it'. God knows why.
The result?

Mother: "I am not leaving until I get that form."
Teller: "I cannot give it to you."
Mother: "fine! I shall go to another branch with people who actually help"
She pushes back her chair angrily.
Mother: "Come on Kate! We're leaving!"
She storms out of the room, followed by the eyes of all who are present in the building. A meek figure trails behind. Just before the sliding doors close she hollers
"I'm not putting up with this shit!"

I should have been embarrassed for myself, supportive and sympathetic for mother, and felt a tinsy degree of empathy for the reputation of the branch. Instead, i felt the corners of my mouth twist into a smile. The situation was just so exceedingly dramatic and soapie-like...I couldn't help it.
"Not one very happy chappy!" i thought cheerily.

mozarts wonky left eyebrow!

my friends, i hope you are ok. missing you.

luv katey watey

QUOTE OF THE DAY: (love's divine, seal)

Well I try to say there's nothing wrong
But inside I felt me lying all along
But the message here was plain to see
Believe me

'Cause I need love, love's divine
Please forgive me now I see that I've been blind
Give me love,
love is what I need to help me know my name

tazzie. help.

GUYS!

great. that's just great, ya know. The first time i have an internet connection in literally a week and none of you guys are online. all alone. i miss you guys.

if there is one thing i have learned from this trip it is...

i am so fucked up.

oh jesus. meeting my cousins was quite possibly the worst experience. ever. No. i do not think you realise. They were all laughing and happy. I could have been an unpleasant wart on auntie agathys face, judging by the times they actually looked at me. But i don't blame them...believe me. i was the most unsociable little shit and the most peeving little snob that i could hardly even believe myself. Horrible. After the visit, i spent the next hour with only two sentences running through my mind:

Kate you fuckin bastard.
What is wrong with you???
...plus excess profanity.

i have gotta go now. cause the connection costs like, 55c per bloody second.

Well, other places weren't so bad, cause we travelled around...but i just want to go home. Want to pat my tiggies, want to slump in front of the TV (ah sweet tv) want to go on the internet, want to be myself and not tense up every second and let my inhibitions get the better of me.
sigh.

ness, sam. *kate smiles a small smile*

n'stuff

speech night last night. Talk about boring. i sat next to Tamara for the entire night, you know, just us two, because the people directly next to us were in orchestra. She had this habit of leaning in uncomfortably close. I did not want to appear rude by flinching away, so i just sat there stiffly, while inconspicuously leaning an inch per minute to my right. Ahem, personal space, doncha know?
Mr Lee's speech was one of the most boring talks i have ever heard. Please, my mind screamed out in desperation, please God, Vishnu, Allah, i don't give a damn which one of you! use your mighty powers to open the ceiling and smite him, smite him i say! for the love of mankind!
the sole fragment of interest that existed, like a piece of gold in a pile of turd, was when the representative from the church gave his speech.
There is something just so indescribably hilarious in the word 'plumbline'.
i could not help myself. I tried, with all my power to restrain that snort of laughter from escaping when the word floated out of his mouth. But i could not. My body shook with suppressed chuckles. I reckon Tamara thought i was having a severe attack of epilepsy. She probably assumed the paryoxsym had killed me, because after that, it appeared as though i was following through with rigor mortis. *yawn*

damn you lucky people. (!)

oi, phili! i praise your judgement! i am loving this book that you recommended, "its not all about you, calma!". All it's witticisms! fuuuny.

QUOTE(s) OF THE DAY: (it's not all about you, calma...heh heh! hilarious.)

"You might remember that twnty years ago, when you were young inexperienced and suffering from the bad taste that characterised the early eighties, you fell under the noxious spell of a seria loser called Robert. Intead of spurning him, as one would a rabid dog, you lost the plot to such an extent that you muttered 'i do' in front of appalled witnesses at a regsitry office."

"her eyes slowly came into focus and she turned her head towards me. There wer things in teh morgue with quicker reaction times. The chewing continued, a cow-like rumination."

"we were like the trajectories of celestial bodies- once in a long while our paths coincided and the collision was often spectacular."

"I hobbled to my feet, suppressing the temptation to scream a four letter word beginning with 'f' and ending with 'uck' at the top of my voice."

gory headlines

yeah, i know, this is my quadrillionth entry today. But...i was just looking through the news, and typed in 'stab' into the search section. HOW DEPRESSING. let me give you some of the headlines that came up:

• Woman stabs dog that attacked her cat
• Teacher stabs student with pen
• 4-Year-Old Stabs Mother's Boyfriend In The Head
• Deputies: Father Stabs Son to Death in Self-Defense
• Aunt Stabs Nephew Who Is Mute and Autistic In Both His Eyes
• Cops: Mom stabs 2 kids in store bathroom
• Children Run For Help As Man Stabs Wife, Himself

dammit! what is wrong with this crazy world? *note i changed '*!@%ed up' to 'crazy'. aren't you proud?

ok...right. i'm just listening to this song. it is the weirdest song i have ever heard. And the sickest. oh jesus. kind of giggle-inducing too. *note: the guy who is singing it has a british accent. genre= electronica*

"excuse me

do you fuck as well as you dance?

are you as hot in the bedroom as you are on the dancefloor?

oh really?

see ya

later

go on

get your kit off

no, not you

put it away

take your dog-like face

to another place"

i just wrote 'crappy poem to be published' no.2
enjoy dearies!

Eye

Soul shaker
Heart maker

Dream bringer
Harbinger

Orb reflector
Passion’s nectar

Hardship payer
Rue conveyor

Deep cutter
Life shutter

Weeper
Memory keeper

quote of the day for last entry

ayaa!! forgot my most important segment! Do forgive me, i implore you.
[these are off igoogle homepage]

QUOTE(s) OF THE DAY:

The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money. - Mark Twain

Nowadays men lead lives of noisy desperation. - James Thurber

Never knock on Death's door: ring the bell and run away! Death really hates that! - Matt Frewer

thoughts on shadows and trees and slaps

sniff sniff. Last 'official' day yesterday of year ten. I don't know why, but it just feels so wrong- you know? Like, i can't really comprehend that it's over. I feel as though i need someone to slap me in the face, just to make me see the reality of the situation. I have attempted the deed (slapping) a few times myself- but alas, i have not seen the light.
sigh.
shall try not think on it. nah, that's bloody impossible. But i will try to try.

umm...sammypoo. wtf. I am not smart. We swearz!! we swearz it...on...on the precious! (lord of the rings, golem). But Seriously. it's a complete fuckin joke that i got it...i'm half expecting that tonight, i'll get up, waiting for my name to be called...and it never does...so i just stand there awkwardly, then retreat back to my seat with the eyes of 4000 burning into my back.

On that subject...my sister was right. She did get the media and biology prize. AND an academic excellence award.
Kate to Frankie: jesus. i've got a bloody lot to live up to ay?
Frankie to kate: heh.
am i doomed to forever live in my sisters shadow? Sometimes i try to reassure myself by saying i have a better grasp on morals than my sister...but this thought don't last long, when i recall how much my ethical compass's dial goes erratic, um, about every few seconds. hmm. eg>i have just noted how profanity has sneaked back into my bloggybyes. *(kate to her foul mouth) back! back! i'm warning you*<

wow. Emo is even affecting Christmas. No more, no more shall the conventional green christmas trees shelter the nations new rollerblades, toy trucks and jocks this summer. Instead; enter, the black christmas tree. Yes. You heard me. Black christmas tree. what. The fuck. The 25th of December is supposed to be a jolly time, a joyous time, a time filled with jocular cries and hearty slaps on the back. But the evil presence of that malign tree shall creep into every heart and DESTROY the warmth that this time of year brings. *noise of retching on blood and dramatic death* Once a symbol of peace and happiness, the blackened branches shall extend their twistened twigs, creeping up behind the innocent child. The genesis of laughter on lips shall die, as families sense 'it's' malicious aura reigning over christmas. No longer shall it be the protector of prezzies, but the jealous possessor.
alas! woe, woe! save yourselves, my dear friends, save yourselves! burn the beasts i say, burn! [or for the more environmentally conscious of you who is disinclined to add to our co2 emmissions, get out a saw and nails and convert them into bedside tables]

speed of life

ehhhhhh....

Just got back from Subiaco...was dragged there by family. There's this random festival going on.
sometimes i wonder if my sister has any inhibitions at all. She was taking pictures of randoms. Openly. From about 2 metres away. Not even a 'hey, do you mind?'; she just fished out her camera and clickety-click. Snapshot. And she kept taking pictures of cute little girls- after watching that movie last night (one-hour photo) it was kind of freaking me out.
There wasn't anything all that interesting. omg, but there was the sweetest faced book-seller; you know that smile that just makes the corners of your eyes soften? I told my sister this and she goes "nah, i only go for hot dudes. And emos."
hmm. there a number of things i find wrong with that sentence.
a) there needn't be an 'AND emos'. Cuz emo's ARE hot.
b) one shouldn't judge so superficiously
c) one shouldn't base one's penchants for the opposite sex on the amount of bleach they have in their hair, or the way their muslces are toned, or (if i be frank) the size of their dick.
You know, sammie, you're right. I probably will end up with a fat ugly man for a husband. In fact, i can't really imagine it any different.

I don't want the year to end. It's gone fast. Too damn fast. Every time you try to savour the time- draw out all the moments, Time's cruel hands slice it's face faster so the hours go by like seconds.

counting crows, ghost train
"I took the cannonball down to the ocean
Watched the diesel disappear beneath the tumbling waves
Love is a ghost train howling on the radio
"Remember everything." she said, "when only memory remains."

garden city escapade

(nice sammie. [kate attempts to smother a chuckle. unsuccessfully])

I went to Garden City yesterday for Secret Elf..and i needed to get some clothes for Tasmania as well. Eh. hate shopping. My sister was in her element, whipping out skirts and dresses and shorts that (if they were a centimetre shorter) could pass off as undergarments. And me? I ended up buying a couple of shorts from K-mart. Yeah, i know, out of all the stores; Live, Katie, Jay Jays, forever new, etc, i chose clothes from the crappiest store there was in the whole darn place. Meh- they were cheap. Plus, i feel uncomfortable in all those high-fashion places- like i don't belong. There are all these hot chicks running expert eyes over slinky chic silks, their manicured nails inspecting price tags...and then there's me...standing there. In boardies and a baggy t-shirt. Trying not to curl my lip or turn my toes inward at my own severe inadequecies at fitting in. Sis was a 'good mentor' though.
guess what? we went to diva and saw this packet of three pairs of earrings. There were also these skull earrings- except they were on a different three pack.
Amy: 'hey! why don't we switch them around?'
Kate (pauses) : 'OK'
The two sisters fumble inconspicuously with the packets and transfer them from one packet to the other. They waltz up to the counter.
Counter chick: "just this one?'
Amy: 'yeah'
then, the transferred earrings fall off from the packet, because they were not secured with those little bits of plastic at the back.
Counter chick: 'hang on. these ones don't seem to have backing.'
Amy looks desperate. Kate assumes a bemused expression.
Counter chick: 'i'll just get you another packet. hey anne! can you get another one of these?'
Amy twitches as counter chick puts the packet beside the cash register.
Counter chick: 'here we go! that'll be $9.95 thanks!' [bloody expensive ey?]
The two walk off, Kate still grinning.
Kate: bugger.

I am so easily swayed. I really shouldn't have agreed to the plot- i know it was wrong. But you know, it's like old times. I could never really say no to amy.

QUOTE(s) OF THE DAY: (from one-hour photo...i watched it last night. talk about creepy- but i still felt such as surge of pity for Sy, the main character. Poor guy.)

Sy Parrish: People take pictures of the happy moments in their lives. Someone looking through our photo album would conclude that we had led a joyous, leisurely existence...free of tragedy. Nobody takes a picture of something they want to forget.

Sy Parrish: Most people don't take snapshots of the little things. The used Band-Aid, the guy at the gas station, the wasp on the Jell-O. But these are the things that make up the true picture of our lives. People don't take pictures of these things.

Sy Parrish: And if these pictures have anything important to say to future generations, it's this: I was here. I existed. I was young, I was happy, and someone cared enough about me in this world to take my picture. [please do not apply this quote to me!]

saving private ryan

I watched Saving Private Ryan last night. God. A film has never moved me like that before. When medic Wade died, I cried. Not subtle wimperings which can be passed off as stomach pains- i'm talking about full-out sobbing. It was...ah, jeez, there isn't a word i can find to describe it.
I was having my dinner during the first section- which i discovered was a very bad idea. I saw a man who look upon his own guts spilling from his body and his hands, slick with his own blood, treid desperately and fruitlessly to hold himself together, screaming. I saww a man with a raw bleeding stump for an arm, who then spotted his limb on the ground and picked it up as though hypnotised. I saw a man who had just escaped death when a bullet bounced off his helmet- he took it off in shock, as though astounded at his luck, only for another missile to gouge straight through his forehead. But i keep thinking about this one happening. See, the survivors had run out of ammunition. And so, they ran back out onto the red-stained beach, littered with the bodies of their mates. One man was still alive, and he cried out as he saw people rushing towards him- perhaps he thought they were going to save him. But instead they grabbed the bullets from him, and left him for the sand to soak his life away. I'm not saying that what the men did was wrong- in fact, if they had stayed to help him, they would become targets themselves. They probably would join him, in fact. Another bleeder on the beach. But just thinking of that hope that must have risen in his throat as the dying man saw them coming towards him, only for them to turn away without a backward glance...it's just so damn heart-breaking.
I had just taken half a bite out of a cherry tomato when the film started. I looked down at it through the darkness, and couldn't see anything but how red it was- and i imagined its juice running down my mouth in rivers, like a repulsive bloody simulation. I know, crazy...those kinda films do weird stuff to my mind. It made me think of Lord of the Rings (Return of the King), in the scene when Faramir has just gone to fight a futile battle to try and prove his worth to his father. Denethor sits hunched, over his thrown, eating a feast as his men are shot like game on the fields. His long hair shrouds his face with his glinting eyes fixated on his plate, juice spurting out of his lips grotesquely, staining his hands. After that, i could not look at my plate without feeling sick to the stomach.
Jesus.
Two words: Fuck War.

QUOTE OF THE DAY: (saving private ryan)

Medic Wade: [after loosing a man on Omaha shouting] Just give him a fucking chance you son of a bitch! Son of a fucking bitch!

Captain Miller: You want to leave? You want to go off and fight the war? All right. All right. I won't stop you. I'll even put in the paperwork. I just know that every man I kill the farther away from home I feel.

Captain Miller: Sometimes I wonder if I've changed so much, my wife is even gonna recognize me whenever it is I get back to her, and how I'll ever be able to, tell about days like today. Ahh, Ryan. I don't know anything about Ryan, I don't care. The man means nothing to me; he's just a name. But if, you know, if going to Rem"al, and finding him so he can go home, if that earns me the right to get back to my wife, well then, then that's my mission.

Corporal Upham: [Wade lying down, shivering with pain and anguish, after being shot through the stomach] Tell us what to do... tell us how to fix you.
Captain Miller: What can we do Wade? Tell us what to do.
Medic Wade: [Wade still shivering] I could use some... I could use a little Morphine.
Captain Miller: [Capt. Miller to Sergeant Horvath] Okay... Give it to him... Give it him!